If you’re one of those women who have husbands who rub your pregnant belly and talk to your unborn child, and generally treat you like you’re in a “delicate state,” then consider yourself lucky.

Pregnant Doesn’t Mean Delicate (for me anyhow)

At seven months pregnant with my second child my husband had me help him move not one but two heavy mattresses down the stairs. He doesn’t rub my now very pregnant belly, BUT I know the look he’ll have on his face the second his child arrives. I know that he’ll listen to her breathing every night. In short, I know from experience that he’ll be just as great a dad to baby number three as my other two.

When it comes to parenthood, we’re all about Mom, right? Moms know best when it comes to their kids, right? They read the most articles on parenting, tend to spend the most time with their kids, and tend to take on the role of primary care giver. I’m not going to lie, I remember telling my husband:

“When it comes to our kids, you are the CFO, but I’m the CEO and you need to check with me.”

Not my finest snarky moment I’ll grant you that, but in my defense he had just taken the kids to the store to pick out a dessert five minutes before dinner time causing my son to tailspin into a full on meltdown. Despite the frustration that comes from our different parenting styles, I can safely say that “He’s No MOM” and here are the reasons why that is the BEST thing for our kids and why we should celebrate the fathers out there.

Hannah & Daddy

1. Dads Create A BalanceĀ  – Sometimes moms tend to freak out at every bump and scrape (sure I never do that LOL) and there needs to be a calm person even when the situation does warrant a trip to the Emergency Room. Both parents can’t freak out or else who would take charge of a situation and keep the kids calm? Sometimes it’s dad’s turn to freak, but that’s why it’s great to have a tag team partner in times of crisis.

2. Someone Has To Be Good Cop – In my house my kids know that I’m the one to lay down the law and daddy is the one to “get one over on.” But the truth is, if we examine our own lives, we really needed that as kids. Sometimes the rules are meant to be broken and occasionally dessert SHOULD come before dinner. Moms may keep us grounded, but dads inject some much needed magic into childhood. As long as he backs me up on the important things, I guess I can learn to appreciate my husband’s breaking of the “mom rules” once in awhile.

3. Someone Call For Security? – Ok so maybe it’s just in my household because my husband works in law enforcement and carries a gun, a taser and handcuffs, but my husband brings a sense of physical security that I just don’t. I think we all feel more secure when he’s home. Perhaps it’s the same in your household. I think just the nature of daddies being bigger and more imposing than mommies, makes kids feel a sense of security, like they are protected from the bad guys out there. I don’t know if the need to protect is something innate in men or learned, but my son is always telling me that he will protect me if a bear ever tries to attack me (guess the bear threat comes with the territory of living up here in the mountains).

When I think of physical comforting of our children, mommy’s hugs are for healing and daddy’s hugs are for reassurance that everything is right with their world.

The Dad Jungle Gym

Plus who else could be the human jungle gym that dads are. Sure they may have made my uterus a training camp for future Olympic gymnastics for 9 months, but I’m not the one my kids want to catch them as they do crazy stunts like jump down the stairs while running at full speed.

Snow tubing

4. They Bring A Different Skill Set – Men bring different interests and skills to the parenting table. I for one would rather die than watch sports with my kids and I’m not the one who will teach my kids how to fish or build things with their hands. Dads will bring not only a different perspective, but different skills than moms, even if those aren’t the typical sports and outdoor survival skills. We need to appreciate them for things they do well that we don’t because it makes our kids’ lives that much richer and well-rounded to be exposed to new things.

Fishing

Hannah Fishing

Are Stay-At-Home Dads The New Moms?

Men are becoming more and more responsible for childcare these days, but I’ve noticed a trend to idolize these men (especially Stay-At-Home Dads) for taking on a role that’s not typical for them – the “Mom role” if you will. We tend to look at these men like a new species in a zoo. We might think, “Wow he changes diapers, hosts play dates, AND volunteers on the PTA, how amazing!” Nobody ever says, “Oh she works full-time and still finds time to cook, clean and drive the kids to karate and ballet, how incredible!” Just because our roles may overlap sometimes doesn’t mean that we can or will tackle parenting the same way.

The truth is Dads will never be Moms and vice versa and that’s more than ok; that’s GREAT! We bring different and special gifts to our children’s lives that can’t be measured on the same scale.

So Happy Father’s day to all the great Dads out there! You really are just as important to your kids as Moms are so keep doing what you’re doing. Happy Father’s Day to my husband Willie! Enjoy the last one before we officially become outnumbered.

 

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